Catch Up #2 From Sarah Simmons

September 11, 2011

I Have Gained a Romanian Family

These past ten days (Has it only been ten?!) have been packed full of extreme felicity. I’ve taken a giant-sized bite out of Romanian hospitality; and I am better for it.

Catch Up #1 From Sarah Simmons

Hello Blogging World!

This is Sarah Simmons signing in for a couple blogposts. I’ve been keeping my own blog (kind-of) up to date since the beginning of our Romanian adventure. So I’m going to summarize what I’ve already written. Do enjoy. :)

Beauty on High

Hey God, remember when you created the heavens and the earth? Well, I haven’t seen heaven yet, but I was able to get a small glimpse

of the beautiful earth that you created while I was in the
Retezat Mountains and it was mind-blowing. The beauty of your creation and
creations has humbled me once again. The feeling of being so small was real, it
made me realize just how incomprehensibly big you are, and how all power on
heaven and on earth really does lie in your hands. I was blessed in so many
ways on this trip, but also had to rely on you a lot for patience and strength.
Father, on this trip you struck me with the truth that there is power beyond
compare in the name of your Son, beauty beyond measure in vulnerability, and
satisfaction and peace in you that surpasses any pleasure here on earth.

As I was preparing for this trip to
Retezat, I was confident in my physical abilities, but still unsure of what to
expect. As we began the first incline, I was humbled by the intensity of the
incline and heaviness of the pack. I was exhausted and we were not even halfway
through the first day. I honestly wanted to give up at points. I remember
thinking “I didn’t sign up for this!” But throughout the day I was encouraged
by everyone else’s persistence and by the beauty of the place we were in. I
remember when things got really hard I would simply repeat the name of Jesus in
my head with every step. I knew I wasn’t alone, I knew no one else could help
me because their packs were just as heavy, and I was confident that the most
powerful name in the entire universe would give me the strength I needed to get
to our final destination each day, even if I felt like I could no longer
continue.

After long days of traveling up the
mountain, it was refreshing to know that I was able to have some time to sit
and listen to my sisters tell their stories. I remember being scared to reveal
things in my life that I had gone through, but as I was praying and preparing
the day that I was supposed to share my story, I was comforted by the fact that
my past is not who I am today and the places that God has brought me through
are all a testament to his incredible mercy, goodness, and faithfulness to his
promises. I knew this was a safe place and decided to dig deep into my life. It
was incredible to see everyone else doing the same thing. I was awed by some of
the crap that people have had to go through. Honestly at times I was sick to my
stomach and my heart literally ached for my sisters. But I was also able to see
the good that God had done in their lives as well. I think a lot of times,
women especially, tend to think that the messier their story, the less
beautiful it is or the less beautiful they are. But I can honestly say that
after hearing everything, my sisters were glowing! They were so beautiful and
pure; the scales were taken off my eyes and they were glowing with the love of
Christ. I knew I was getting a glimpse of how God sees us. This made me realize
why/how God must love us so much. If I was able to see through the grime and
messiness of a person’s life and simply see beauty, how much more does God see
them as beautiful! He loves our hearts and he loves to hear them. He is given
glory through our stories even if they seem to only hold brokenness and scars.
The beauty that comes from this vulnerability is something of a mystery that
can only be explained by our Heavenly Father.
There were a few experiences on the
mountain where peace literally flowed over me like a river. The first
experience was on the solo. In my time on the mountain, nothing profound
happened; I read, prayed, wrote in my journal and watched the clouds pass by.
But as I was sitting there I just felt as though no matter what was thrown at
me, I was going to be okay, I was safe, and I was in the arms of God. It did
not matter what came next, because I knew who was in control. I remember specific
times during the solo when I was cold, and then the sun would come out, then I
would be hot, and the sun would go behind a cloud. It may seem silly, but I
reminded me of God’s faithfulness and how I should not worry about tomorrow,
because I am being taken care of today. I was also reminded of God’s peace when
we stopped and ate lunch at the place where the horses were. I went up to the
peak and just sat there, taking in all the beauty that was in front of me. All
I could think of over and over was “God, you are enough.” I was so blessed by
those words. My time in Romania so far had been wonderful, but I still wasn’t
content with where I was. I was missing home and living for the next time I
would be able to speak with a friend or family member. I was not able “to be
where I am when I am where I am.” But something clicked while I was praying on
that peak that allowed me to be content. I knew it wasn’t always going to be
easy, but I felt like I was more equipped to handle it.
Heavenly Father, I thank you for the
truth that you revealed to me on this trip. I was able to see just how powerful
the name of Jesus is, how beauty can come through vulnerability and how you are
enough for me, no matter where I am in the world. As I was climbing the
mountain, repeating the name of Jesus in my head, I realized that this needs to
be something I do in my everyday life. When I am frustrated with a situation
and I feel like I can no longer carry on or have no motivation to, I need to
speak the name of your Son. I need to turn to you for help before I turn to
anyone else. The beauty that I was able to see in my sisters through
vulnerability really convicted me as well. I think from now on, if I am having
a hard time loving someone, I just need to sit down with them and get to know
them better. Knowing a story seems to be an incredible way of seeing people
through your eyes. I pray that I will have the willingness and strength to do
that. And when life is crashing over me, not allowing me to see or think
clearly, I want to remember the peace that comes from being still and waiting
patiently for you. I want to remember how it felt to be so confident in you
that nothing else mattered but being able to hold the hand of the God that
holds the world. Heavenly Father, thank you for allowing these truths to be
revealed, I ask that they would be fertilized and take deep root in my life.

The Ladies of Fall 2011

Yes, we know...we are a little late in getting this thing going this year...not because we haven't been doing exciting things and meeting amazing people, but because of technical reasons (take it up with blogger and gmail.)

But hey...continue to check out this site because updates will be coming soon!

Below is a picture of our students from when they first arrived in Romania and we were up in Sinaia (seems like so long ago!!)

All My People on the Floor Let's Party All Night

The soundtrack to life in Romania is a bouncing dance beat reverberating off the gray walls of the concrete apartment blocks that line the streets and out of every television blaring Kiss TV. There's "Ya Bb," Sam and I's favorite, "All My People," "Tot Mai Sus," "Freedom," "Never Be Alone," and "Senorita," just to name a few, but beware because these songs will hijack your mind; if one of these songs is playing nearby the beat just might captivate you from head to toe so you can't resist the urge to let loose on the floor. Just a warning. Romanian music is intoxicating, to say the least.

I went to a music festival that happened to be taking place just a block from my house, and I was shocked to see the mix of people in the crowd watching the overtly sexual performance by pop singer Andrea Balan. Wearing strappy stilettos and barely-there outfits to match their hot and heavy dance moves and music, this was not a concert where I expected to see elderly people. But there they were, older women with fixed gazes, clearly admiring what was happening on stage. This impression was only confirmed when my host mother and I sat down on a park bench to talk with a distant relative of my host mom and her mother: they were both gushing about how beautiful the performance was and the energy and costumes and everything involved. This is culture shock for me, having a mother who cannot shop in a store with loud, thumping music, nor give even the least bit of approval to suggestive music, dancing or clothing. Even my host dad, who is in his fifties, plays this music in the car, and Andre and Mariana Zaba, an older couple, had Kiss radio playing at their little shack out in the countryside while we helped make zacusca.

As of now I can only guess that young and old Romanians alike enjoy this disco music because its steady bass and catchy melodies drown out the harsh realities of daily life here. During my home stay my host parents Adina and Petre would often complain of terrible back pain and headaches, as a result of hard work in their multiple gardens and various tasks around their house. I think more of the pain is mental rather than physical because they do take an abundance of cigarette breaks throughout the day. One day my host father was explaining how the work never ends, and "asta este viata." This is the reality they live with in this rural Romanian town, and yet they seem to squeeze every ounce of life out of each day. They always have people dropping by to visit and eat "prejitura" (cake) or my host father will make a joke about the most ordinary of occurrences. They take their food very seriously as it is literally what brings the family, and even the gypsy workmen helping them, together; they don't want the perfect, chemical-induced produce from the supermarket, but they work the land to produce their own produce that is bursting with flavor. After all, sarmale (stuffed cabbage rolls), ciorba de fasole (bean soup), and cartofii prejit (french fries) would not taste the same if they were tainted by artificial produce, as I have figured out.

Romanians are still lost in the music of the revolution, having yet to fully emerge from the conformity and dependence that communism ingrained in the people. Gradually the music is growing softer and softer as individuals are enlivened to their own power to love, to create, and to think freely. Programs like Impact are drowning out the music of corruption and distrust, and simultaneously the strengths of Romanian culture, such as their dedication to family, their blunt honesty, their keen sense of humor and their resourcefulness, are creating a new kind of music, ushering in renewed hope of greater freedom.

NHF Study Abroad Program

NHF Study Abroad Program

To Love a Home is to Love the People Living There

It really is a wonder to come back to a dearly loved place and realize that life as you knew it has moved on without you that while you were changing in some beautiful mountainous region that people continued living and not just living but living without you. I have never been the type to be very homesick but arriving in the states and leaving the four people that I bonded with the most during the semester has made me aware that coming back to a place that you have left for a while is much harder than to assimilate into somewhere new. As I was walking into my dorm Hospers, I said goodbye to Kelly and Marit. It wasn’t until I was greeted downstairs by my group of friends here at school that I realized how desperately I missed my Romania people. Now it wasn’t that I was unhappy to see my friends it is just that I know Kelly, Marit, Tad, Zach and the rest of the gang in Romania much better at this moment then the lovely people who greeted me in the lobby. I wanted to stay with the other four for they were what I knew all semester and we at least had an understanding of what we had done and how we had grown. I feel right now as if I don’t have the energy to explain the time I was gone…that I won’t do the semester justice if I try to explain it to those who have not had the same experience. I have never had such an intense reaction to being back in a place but then again I have never come back from such a long period of being gone. Granted three and half months didn’t seem to be that long, but people have been changed by two week trips in the mountains and we had a much longer time away. Three and a half months I chose to be present in Romania and now that I am back I must choose to be present in America, in school in Iowa, and with my family during Christmas break. I am dreading what comes with that choice as I know that I cannot say something and do something else. And sadly it means that thinking about people and mountains in Romania and idealizing Lupeni in the Jiu valley as the best place to be right now is not an option. I do think that without my faith and stronghold that I would not have been capable of going to Romania, much less coming back. And though I know that it may be a near impossible feat to become fully present in America it is the only way that I can become fully here. To all the study abroad students and everyone else who is having a tough time finishing out the semester strong and anyone else who needs a little bit of encouragement, remember that God is a rock who is ever constant and is a firm foundation and if you focus on him he will get you through your tough times. A verse in Psalms emphasizes this point quite well as it is in the context of David praising God for getting him through a tough battle and has been an encouragement to me throughout the semester when I doubt that I am going to be able to overcome my battles. In Psalm 18:1-3 it says, “I love you O lord, my strength. You are my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer, God you are my rock in whom I take refuge, You are my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. You are worthy of my praise, I call out and you have saved me from my enemies.

The Result of watching too much LOST

So because certain people have been pressuring me to watch a certain show and have succeeded in making me watch it, I have been inspired to make a few connections from it to life in Romania. Lost, a show about people deserted on a mysterious island after a plane crash focuses on the survivor’s stories and how they tie into the events that are taking place on the island. As the characters go through challenges on the island each one offers something to the group and they have to work together to use their talents and overcome their weaknesses to help each other survive. After the first few episodes Zach insisted we be paired with character we identified with in the show, but as soon as he decided this he began assigning ones to us himself. As well as all of the characters having their distinct personality traits each one has a major character flaw meaning all of them have a dark side that they each have to try and overcome. As the show continues the characters become more complex. With all this in mind both Zach and Tad gave us each characters because they had seen the entire show. I am sorry to all those who have not seen or heard about Lost for you will probably not understand what I will be making to references to and I will understand if you just stop reading here. If you know who the characters are then you will understand a little bit better but here is who we got stuck with- Kelly as Kate, Marit as Hurley, Zach as Charlie, and Tad as Sayid. At first I was paired with Sawyer because

Kelly and Marit Zach Tad and Julie Tad and Zach

Zach heard that I agreed with Sawyer about not trusting anyone on the island but because I refused to acknowledge that we had been paired and I loathed his character Zach became frustrated that I rejected Sawyer and decided I was Ana Lucia instead though he did not really explain why. Just thought I would show you how obsessed the boys really were with the show and how much of their addiction they passed on to us girls.

Sawyer Ana Lucia

So onto the connections, as the people have done their best to survive on the island through kidnappings, cave collapses, polar bears, creepy “others” and etc. they have had to go through many tough and trying challenges just as we have had to in Romania. Through having to attend sometimes philosophic classes, help in our IMPACT clubs, spend time with our host families and each other and try to communicate in a different language in order to assimilate into Romanian culture we have also had to overcome many challenges to survive. As the characters combat several different catastrophes they and their fellow survivors learn more about themselves and each other coming to understand how to live on an island and the support and life skills you need to be able to do so. In a sense Romania was an island for all of us American students, we could not just leave and go home we had to stick it out until the day came and we were rescued. Though unlike the island survivors for some of us rescuing felt funny and a couple of us were like “No! This is my island home that I have come to love” or something like that because we had come to love the people on the island and the island itself through the lessons gained and challenges we overcame.
My last connection is more of my own personal one. As the story progresses two of the characters happen upon a sealed metal hatch in the woods and to prevent panic do not share their find till the life of one of them is in jeopardy. His last words lead to the discovery of the hatch and before the secret gets out, the two people go back day after day obsessed in opening it. When I arrived in Romania I was filled with some hard questions that I had been pondering for a while, hoping that a few would be answered in Romania. Every day as we woke up in a different country I became obsessed throwing everything I had at it like Locke and going back over and over asking God if anything would ever be revealed. I did open the hatch like Locke and like him all I found was more questions. But in opening that hatch I learned a valuable lesson as well that though I may question God he will never turn away or get irritated that I am pestering him because he is a patient God who will in his own time answer me. When I think about the other lesson I learned I am reminded of the time when in one of the episodes Locke keeps asking Jack to believe and trust that he was brought there for a reason. Because in the same way I have to accept that God led me to Romania for a reason and though I do not know what is going to come next I believe that God knows and has it under his control.

A Beacon article that (dear old) Barracuda considered spam...So it shall appear here, instead. (a couple days late)

Thanksgiving has come and gone, December has arrived, a phenomenal weekend has been spent in the Cabana (go read two posts down the list, to hear about that one), our final papers have been written and turned in, and we have gone through pre-departure re-entry exercises to prepare us for the ordeal ahead.

It hit me hardest last night: in under a week I will leave Romania and return to the United States.  I’ve known about this all semester— December 6^th, a day to look forward to seeing my friends and family, a day to sit on 3 different airplanes for 14+hours, a day to not forget anything… and now, very honestly, a day to mourn.  Romania is beautiful and hospitable, it is loving and unique and my home and I don’t want to leave.  The people I have met are incredible, the culture, peering past the broken bloc remnants of communism’s legacy, is rich and deep, and the mountains surrounding my Lupeni home are breathtaking.  And tomorrow we will move out of our respective homes in Apartments Lucy and George (Noooo!), tromp off to Bucharest for the weekend and on Monday afternoon, begin flying west towards home. 

Kadie, our amazing program administrator (I start tearing up just thinking about say goodbye to her), found this beautiful quote (From Reading Lolita in Tehran by Azar Nafisi) which aptly sums up what most of us seem to be thinking right now: “You get a strange feeling when you’re about to leave a place…like you’ll not only miss the people you love but you’ll miss the person you are now at this time and this place, because you’ll never be this way ever again.”  It is nice to have words to describe at least that piece of the jumble of thoughts stomping through my brain, a weekend before the end.  

There is no way that I could summarize my semester for you in 600 words, so instead let me urge you to go find out for yourself, perhaps not in Romania (although I would highly recommend it to some people!), but somewhere.  You have a unique opportunity, as a college student, to spend a piece of summer or a whole semester off-campus.  …You’ll need at least that many credits worth of electives eventually anyway AND it fulfills your cross-cultural Gen-Ed requirement—or pick a program that fits your major and the list of great academic reasons gets longer— it’s an opportunity well worth taking!  Enjoy your Northwestern community, but remember that the world is so much bigger than we sometimes remember in the jostle of classes, homework and campus obligations.  The walk to and from the caf seems endless sometimes, but outside the edges of campus, a bigger world awaits (and I don’t just mean Orange City…or even Sioux county). And with such a diverse range of opportunities just an application away, it seems a shame not to at least consider experiencing a new place, a new subject matter and a new vision of life in a way you might not have the chance to ever again.  I mean, seriously, how many of us will have the chance to just up & move to a country of our choice for 4 months ever again…and with scholarships, to boot!  You might learn a few things about the difference between knowledge and understanding.  You might be stretched by thoughts you didn’t know were out there.  You might be captured by the beauty of the earth, the diversity of the human race, a new way of seeing…who knows, you might even fall in love with a place, a people, a way of life.  You might discover another place that you will remember as home.   I have.

So goodbye until Monday, Northwestern, and be prepared…because ready or not, here we come with all our stories and our excitement (and our reverse-culture-shock-combined-with-jet-lag-crankiness!  Oh boy...). 

"Wait a minute, I'm the leader, I'll say when its the end.......It's the end"

We have 5ish days till we are back in the states. As I look back at what this semester has been I am both pleasantly surprised as well as disappointed. This semester is not what I thought it was going to be. It was not an easy semester, I couldn't go wherever I wanted on the weekends, I was not invisible among the Romanian crowd. In some cases I was viewed as the ignorant American, in other cases I was seen as that lucky, awesome American, neither of which I liked at all. I didn't make relationships the way I wanted to. I didn't leave Father Ciocan's house feeling good about myself in regards that I made my stay pleasant for them. I have regrets and I can't change that. I don't know if it's possible to have an experience like this and not leave without regrets.

However, in spite of all the things that I regret, there is so much more good that happened. Yes, it was a hard semester, but an excellent semester. I learned more than I could have dreamed of. Many time I ask myself, "What is a computer science major doing on a semester like this?" Well the answer is a simple answer, I just plain ole wanted to travel abroad, I love traveling and I wanted to see the world. This semester offered that to me. But even though I'm a computer science major I still had a wonderful time learning about the issues in our classes. Obviously since were in Romania, I had a Romanian Culture and History class, and I definitely enjoyed it. Since the Romania is mostly Orthodox Christian we had an Eastern Orthodoxy class, and since I am Christian Reformed I had many beneficial struggles and eye openers in this class. Since we are studying under an organization that deals with development we had a class call Sustainable and Human development, many of the things I learned in this class I had never heard of before, and I loved it, even though it was insanely hard and confusing at times. And since this organization uses experiential education to teach kids about how to be active in their communities I had a class called Experiential Education. This class I probably struggled the most with, since I'm not good with short term relationships that I had to make with the kids. But I still learned a ton from it, I learned what New Horizons is all about and what experiential education can do for kids and their country.

But this semester was great for more than just the classes. We had amazing awesome trips around Romania which showed us beautiful sights and taught us a little more about Romania's history. Our group of students was able to bond and not tear at each others throats by the end. I found this fascinating, not that I wanted to tear at each others throats but I just thought that a group this small would get sick of each other quite fast under the circumstances that put us together all the time. But the opposite happened to my delight and I can honestly say that we are good friends. There are many, many, many (I probably need more manys on this one) more reasons why this semester was fantastic, there just isn't enough room in this blog to tell them all. So it's the end now, we have a week till we're back in the states. With that being said, I would like to thank everyone who prayed for me and kept me in their thoughts. And I would like to thank our semester leaders who put up with us and enjoyed some good times with us (hopefully). Thank you all, the end is nigh.

-Zach Hankel